In order to fill out the complete story of Joseph the Seer and his recently unveiled seer-stone, John, Glenn, Matt, Randy, and Jake dip into the rich historical record and read witness accounts of Joseph’s contemporaries, in a documentary minisode that “De-Romances the Stone.”
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Matt, Kristin, and Jake sing their praise to the world’s bestest magic seer stone. Thanks to Andrew Ainsworth for the lyrics.
New LDS Hymn: Praise to the Stone
VERSE 1
Praise to the stone that was found by the Prophet!
For treasure seeking it first was employed
Though to the buried loot it never did lead him
The stone aided Joseph in a greater ploy
CHORUS:
Hail to the seer stone that glowed like a Lite Brite!
Wizards and Hobbitses, now seek it in vain!
Magically guiding the Prophet’s dictation
Released from the vault now enjoys worldly fame
VERSE 2
Praise to the stone that made the gold plates superfluous!
No record needed, the words just appeared
Nephi and Mormon their labors were wasted
The stone bore their words when Joseph into it peered
(CHORUS)
VERSE 3
Praise to the stone in the hat of our Seer!
Rock-solid proof that folk magic is real
Scrying we now know is pow’red by the Priesthood
True version of Saruman’s Palantir
(CHORUS)
VERSE 4
Praise to the stone chocolate-colored and egg-shaped!
Who now can deny Brother Joseph’s great claims?
How could our Prophet make up such a story?
God wants our faith not the use of our brains
(CHORUS)
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Glenn gazes into his peep stone for the translation of Chapter 2. Seriously. This is totally real, you guys.
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Randy shares a semi-fictional experience from his youth.
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Listener Mike Leavitt magnified his response to the Infant challenge and created this amazing Church House Rock parody. Listen in.
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John and Glenn discuss John’s new Church House Rock parody: Priesthood Power.
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Do Mormons really believe that the Lord God created the universe? Or that God lives on a planet called Kolob? Or that in 1978 God changed his mind about black people?
Get ready for the most hard-hitting, deep-penetrating, truth-cutting-to-the-chase-of Investigative Reporting you have ever ever ever heard! Cuz the Infants are going to satirically take you through the many erroneous Truth Claims of The Book of Mormon Musical’s “I Believe.”
It’s not exactly Casey Kasem calling a Monster Truck rally. But it is almost just that cool.
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Join us for a special edition of the April 2015 General Conference. Because one weekend of General Conference just isn’t enough… without this.
Special thanks to Jake, Glenn, Randy, and Bob for “assisting” the Brethren.
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For anyone who wants to know the true history and destiny for the USofA.
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Glenn gazes into his peep stone for a new translation of an old (but not THAT old) classic.
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